Communication is more than words—it’s about connection, understanding, and navigating everyday life. For individuals with Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder (FASD), communication challenges can make daily interactions overwhelming. Difficulties with processing verbal information, following multi-step instructions, and expressing thoughts can lead to frustration and misunderstandings.
However, every individual with FASD has unique strengths, and by using the right strategies, we can support them in a way that enhances their confidence and success.
Let’s meet Ethan, a 16-year-old with FASD, to explore how communication challenges affect his life and how simple changes can make a difference.
Ethan is a creative and friendly teenager who thrives in hands-on activities. He has an incredible memory for stories, loves music, and enjoys working with his hands—especially when building things.
However, Ethan struggles with verbal communication. He often misses parts of conversations, has trouble following multi-step instructions, and can feel lost when people speak too fast or give too many details at once. While he wants to do well at school and work, he sometimes avoids tasks because he’s unsure of what’s expected
At School: Struggling to Keep Up, But Excelling in Creativity
In English class, Ethan’s teacher explains a project:
“For this project, you’ll need to research an environmental issue, write a one-page summary, and prepare a short presentation for next week. Make sure to include at least three sources.”
Ethan hears the first part but gets lost in the details. By the time the teacher is done speaking, his brain is still processing the first step. He looks around and sees classmates writing things down, but he doesn’t know where to start. Instead of asking for help—because that makes him feel embarrassed—he avoids the assignment altogether.
However, when given a hands-on project, a visual guide, or a creative task, Ethan shines. He can express his ideas through art, music, and storytelling in ways that captivate others. When his teacher allows him to make a short video instead of writing an essay, he thrives.
At Work: Reliable and Hardworking, But Needs Clear Instructions
Ethan has a job at a local café, where he is responsible for small tasks. His manager gives him instructions:
“Ethan, can you wipe down the counters, restock the sugar packets, and take out the trash?”
Ethan nods, but his brain gets stuck on the first step. He starts wiping the counter, then completely forgets what comes next. He doesn’t want to seem “lazy,” so he avoids his manager instead of asking for clarification.
However, when given clear step-by-step instructions, written reminders, or a checklist, Ethan excels. He is hardworking, reliable, and detail-oriented when the expectations are clear. If his manager gives him one task at a time or provides a simple written list, Ethan completes everything efficiently.
Ethan’s mom is getting ready to leave for the grocery store. She calls out:
“Ethan, while I’m gone, can you unload the dishwasher, put your clean clothes away, and take the dog out in an hour?”
Ethan nods, but as soon as the door closes, he gets distracted by a video game. He remembers his mom asked him to do something, but he’s not sure what or in what order. He starts unloading the dishwasher but stops halfway through when he notices his phone buzzing. By the time his mom returns, the dishes are half-done, his clothes are still in the basket, and the dog is pacing by the door. Ethan feels overwhelmed and guilty—he wanted to get everything done, but the tasks slipped away from him.
These struggles don’t mean Ethan isn’t trying—he just needs reminders and strategies that help him stay focused and organized.
Practical Strategies for Effective Communication
1. Keep It Simple and Direct
It is important to use short, clear sentences to avoid complex instructions. Provide one step at a time, allowing time for the individual to process before adding the next step. Key points should be repeated and reinforced in different ways, ensuring clarity. Figurative language and sarcasm should be avoided, as these can lead to confusion.
2. Use Visual and Written Supports
Incorporating checklists, schedules, and reminders, whether using words or pictures, can be helpful. Color-coding important information will aid in its recognition. Additionally, using sticky notes, whiteboards, or digital reminders can assist in task management.
3. Check for Understanding
Instead of asking, “Do you understand?”, it is more effective to say, “Can you show me what to do first?” Encouraging the individual to repeat instructions in their own words can confirm comprehension. It is essential to foster an environment where questions are welcomed, reassuring them that it is okay to seek clarification.
4. Reduce Sensory Overload
Whenever possible, instructions should be given in a quiet, low-stimulation environment. Reducing background noise and distractions can help individuals focus better. Allowing for breaks if they seem overwhelmed is also beneficial.
5. Allow Processing Time
After giving an instruction, it is helpful to pause for 5-10 seconds before repeating it. Avoid rushing or assuming that the person is ignoring you if they do not respond right away. Patience and flexibility with response times are key.
6. Focus on Strengths and Positive Reinforcement
Acknowledging successes, no matter how small, is important for building confidence. Positive reinforcement should be prioritized over criticism. Additionally, feedback should be framed constructively, using phrases like, “Let’s try it this way,” instead of, “That’s wrong.”
7. Build Predictability with Routines
Maintaining consistent routines can help reduce anxiety and increase confidence. Providing advance notice of changes will assist individuals in managing transitions better. Using timers, alarms, or countdowns can prepare them for shifts in activities.
By applying these strategies, we can create an environment where individuals like Ethan can thrive, reducing frustration and boosting confidence in communication.
Final Thought: Communication is a Two-Way Street
Ethan has talents. He is capable. He wants to do well. When we adapt our communication to match his strengths, we empower him to succeed.
✨ What strategies work for you? Share your experiences and help others build better connections!